A homeowner who hit an Australian reddit thread hoping for suggestions on jazzing up a shoddy makeshift downstairs shower area received an unexpected dose of bloody black humour over the space one person likened to an “underground torture chamber”.
The poster on the r/AusRenovation thread earnestly asked for tips on how to repaint the floor of the rustic shower space to protect the concrete resin underneath, noting it had been previously painted with a sort of enamel paint.
“Don’t know if I’m better to do some kind of resin or spray silicone,” the aspiring renovator noted in their post.
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But it was the accompanying picture of a darkly lit downstairs area, walled off by corrugated iron and featuring suspicious red stains, a grim worktable and some incongruous shower loofahs which sparked a veritable “bloodbath” in the comments section.
“I’ve been waiting to comment because I didn’t want to be the first mean one,” came the first reply. “But you could get the people who are chained up down there to do it.”
“Wolf Creek vibes for sure,” another replied.
“What the f… buffalo bill,” said one wag, referring to one of the serial killers in Silence Of The Lambs.
“It paints the enamel on the floor or get the shower again,” another redditor quipped, while a third simply posted a pic of Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter.
“Jeffrey Dahmer’s shower,” someone else replied.
“It’s a masculine aesthetic eerily reminiscent of an underground torture chamber,” one poster argued. “If I was being picky I’d say maybe enhance the ‘Silence Of The Lambs’ influence a little more. A few more blood stains, dynabolt hooks into the wall to shackle more victims etc.”
There were some rare attempts to stick to the serious renovation matter at hand.
“I think resin should do the trick, but recommend to apply a slip-proof coat on top. Also judging from this picture, I would recommend to rework the ventilation of the space, and paint any exposed wood structure to protect it from the heat and the moisture,” one of the more helpful redditors suggested.
However, even the more serious suggestions soon descended into the same slaughterhouse vibes.
“It’s probably a long drive to Bunnings from Wolf Creek, but its probably worth installing a proper shower cubicle if you want the floor to be properly protected,” CasualStarlord noted.
“Drainage is particularly important if you’re dealing with copious amounts of blood,” Ollio1985 replied. “If you’re having to deal with clogs all the time, or the occasional finger bobbing back up the drain, consider popping in a garbage disposal.”
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